I don't know who said it first, but this has become my favorite saying. In fact, I close every episode of the Divorce Daily podcast with it.
Divorce is the end of a life, the death of a relationship, the remixing of a family, and so much more. But one thing it isn't, is a black mark on you as a human being. You are beautiful and worthy. No one can take that from you.
Getting divorced sucks. Being divorced doesn't. Have a great day.
In my last blog post, (https://www.preciousstoneslifecoach.com/post/stuck-in-a-compromising-position), I shared the story about me trying on a dress. The zipper broke and there I was stuck in the dressing room with the dress hanging on my waist.
To pick up the story where I left off last time... I started to get nervous and the sweat kicked in! I stood in that dressing room thinking what am I going to do?
Check out the rest of the blog story here to find out what I did... https://www.preciousstoneslifecoach.com/post/release-and-free
There is a cultural obsession with relationship success meaning longevity.
There’s a romanticized notion of codependency and undying devotion.
If a partner is attracted to someone else, that means something about how they feel. Actually, everything our partner does means something about us.
This is the ego’s fragile version of love. This love is rooted in controlling behavior, the desire to change another, and dynamics that reflect child-parent relationships rather than two self actualized adults creating a life together.
I’ll be the first to admit that as my partner and I did the work to evolve into a relationship on our own terms, my ego was incredibly reactive. This conditioning is very deep. It’s not easy to hear someone that they feel too much pressure to make you happy/understood. It’s not fun to hear someone say ‘I’m not your mother.’ That’s what we unconsciously do to each other in the name of ego love: hold another person responsible for our unhealed past.
It takes lot of work and self compassion to find a love reflective of your highest self. It takes two people who are willing to meet their shadow self with grace— the self most people look away from.
But with time there is a shift. There’s freedom where there was once pressure. There’s trust where there was once blame. There’s humor and adventure where there was once an incessant need for validation.
THIS TRIBE. This group of friends + entrepreneurs includes... Women who craved connection + friendship
Daughters of broken marriages.
Women who have been through divorce.
Women who grew up in foster homes.
Women who lost babies.
Women who are struggling with infertility.
Moms who felt burnt out.
Women who got multiple degrees to end up not feeling fulfilled in their careers.
Women who struggled with disordered eating.
But this tribe also includes:
Women who knew their future wasn't determined by their past.
Women who were willing to step outside of their comfort zones regardless of any fear.
Women who seek growth continually.
Women who don't let excuses stand in their way.
Women who know their future is worth fighting for.
It's weekends like this that I am so PROUD of what I get to do, the lives I get to be a part of changing and the team that I get to stand amongst.