Your soul has been cleansed and
purified through this process of growth.
It's safe to move forward since
you are longer in alignment
with the one(s) you left behind.
When you try to grip even tighter to
what could have, should have or
would have happened if only
you did something differently, or
chose different words or
acted differently or
changed yourself a little bit more,
then you ultimately rob yourself
of the beautiful future
that is waiting to unfold for you.
Adjust your crown.
You did what you knew best,
given your circumstances.
Love, accept and forgive yourself
as you step into the beautiful reality
that is waiting just for you.
. #Poet #Poetry #Author #Coach #Speaker
An old piece
Tell me a story
I ran out of your lies at brunch
Afternoons fell like raindrops in my balcony
Its cold and wintery now
And evenings just don't make me happy like the nights once did
Tell me what have you been upto
Or where you have been
Did you go to all the places we wanted to go and call out my name
Did anyone answer when the echoes of your loneliness filled the air at the Vatican
Tell me you don't feel me
Truths better than white lies
Bitter better than sweet
Do you remember how the cigarette smoke from my mouth
Could cut constellations on your tongue
But now the sky is barren
And the bed stinks of you and is pregnant with a deafening silence
Every night is a painful encore
Tell me did you find love
I know you can't spell the word
But love is my religion
And hope is the tribe I belong to
Did you actually find the one
I know that is what you set out to do Columbus
When you walked out of my door
I hope she is nothing like me
Cos I know there is no one like me
Were you really looking for love
When you found me
Unfortunate yet unforgettable ain't it?
Tell me it was just an accident and nothing more
Tell me this and tell me that
And tell me some more
Meander, you know how much I hate small talk
Make me undress this shame
Unhook, unfuck all your doings
With desperation in tact and diplomacy on your lips
My soul is speaking to your soul
It's unexplainable and beyond my control
You will leave something behind
And take something more
You will not stay but carry my skin to your grave
Let me go
Set me free
Tell me once that it doesn't feel like before
Hearts unmeshed in absence
passion's taken the backseat as I try to love Tara again, like I did before this all began
just before beginning to write, before his suicide
back up five years ago when I took control
when I found myself to be desirable
when I was comfortable
engaged in my own life for the very first time
when everything that was outside of me was grey and dreary
I was vibrant, I was a smile
I became a two mile walk in the woods, I was good
I was front row Zumba killing it
Pilates and weights, I was the gym
made this body great, first time for everything
I was someone to follow
I became INSPIRATION
it was amazing
I was the voice for change and people listened
2012 I was the appearance of brilliance
radiating joyfulness found from personal success
I did it, I finally did it
committed and unstoppable
so I had believed
until I let a stranger's attention distract me
took the new found sexy
into a world of manipulative words and it worked
but I got hooked
throwing out lines and reeling him in
entangled myself in the net
staring at a laptop flirting my ass off
an emotional affair through a screen quickly became a dangerous something, a new addiction
meeting for lunch, kisses some touch
bold to tell my husband enough is enough
and so it unfolds
the beating, the restraining order, the suicide
and there it was, I'm handed my new life
freedom, but the return of my own demons
girl who believes sex and gifts must be given to attract and keep a man's attention
on my way to my next mistake
another committed relationship
fell in love with Mark who was twenty years younger
moved him in three months later
and in four months back out again
but the relationship remained
my rules of engagement continue to change
over three years spent trying to get away
make his dependence on me fade
while all this goes on, so does the weight
every single pound creeps it's way
as I spend all my time writing, hiding
using filters to cover up the damage
create acceptable images to keep readers interested
I'm exhausted, I want back the happiness, can't keep doing this
something's got to give
maybe it's writing #njpoet njpoetry
I have always been fascinated by paper lanterns.
My father brought me one when I was five.
He showed me how to light the candle and hold it properly,
until it is filled with hot air and you don't have to hold it anymore
and it can float on its own and be one with the wind.
I jumped around, clapping, my happiness floated in that paper lantern.
I didn't sleep that night.
I kept wandering the places it would have gone
and when I finally closed my eyes,
I dreamed about it kissing the moon
and playing with its own reflection in the lake.
Next night I urged my father to let me hold it.
He told me that I wasn't ready,
that I would burn it.
I watched him do the same thing again that night,
lighting the candle,
holding it, I wondered what's so special
about him holding that lantern
and why can't I do the same?
I didn't think about the lantern that night.
I asked by pillow to tell me how to hold a lantern.
It didn't talk back, it never does.
But my mother heard me.
She snuggled close to me and whispered in my ear,
"Dream of yourself as a paper lantern,
you will have your answer."
And just like that, I closed my eyes
and I was light as paper,
naïve hands holding my edges carelessly,
the match was lighted,
something was burning, they didn't hold me the right way,
let go of me too early, too late,
there were flames,
I was burning, and then I was in my father's hands,
his warmth in his fingers,
I can see why he was so good at this,
it needed more than just holding,
it needed love and patience,
my father had both of those things, I didn't.
Now I realize that we all are like paper lanterns,
our thoughts become the candle and
our parents hold us until we are able to rise on our own,
until we are filled with enough hot air,
until their fingers are not enough to hold us without burning us,
and then they let go,
and let us be one with the wind,
their happiness floating in paper lanterns.
Picture by: @gianviphotos
#amykaypoemaday Prompt 18: write a haiku using a random word from a random word generator. So we only had to pick 1 of the 6 words, but I ended up trying to use 3 of the 6 randonly generated words! Which were "droplet, "arch," and "ghost." | Stunning opalized ammonite from the ever so lovely @soulfullyadorned 🖤 // @wildflower.musings | #wildflowermusings
I get random creative thoughts for poems that I usually only write down, but this one I wanted to go even further and make a spin-off that included all of my creative aspects such as: mental health awareness enthusiast, writing, and drawing. “Has nobody but knows everything there is to know.”
So my original idea was a gaseous orb that can transform into anything in existence and chooses to reside on earth, often taking the form of a mysterious, intelligent, evasive, and sometimes a powerful animal. Like a wolf, crow/raven, or a dark horse. It takes on these dark forms to hide within the shadows from greedy humans and looking to obtain knowledge from this omnipotent/omnipresent/omniscient being.
However, I felt the urge to aspire for something more.
This idea comes from the tree of knowledge; replaced with a brain. This brain contains every piece of information in the universe and people come to it searching for information about the past, present, or future. To communicate this information, the brain can telepathically transfer a small fraction of its own thoughts and pick a specific section to notify the listener. Being as intelligent as it is, it’s also very clever and likes to twist the truth into the form of a complicated riddle, making it extremely difficult for mere humans to solve and figure out the truth of what they seek. The brain is consistently pulsing and can choose to expand its roots and grow taller, encasing itself in its own branches for protection. Being made of wood, it’s vulnerable and must be protected at all costs, but who would want to destroy this incredible being?
You would be surprised of the ignorance of most humans as they have been through war zones to rid the world of this creature, in fear it would destroy them first and the world they live in. They mistake its cleverness for malice. This being is neither good nor bad. It’s simply there. Nobody knows how it came to be or why it exists, but one thing is for certain: it isn’t of this world.
I left the background blank because when you approach this being, everything around you just seems to disappear.
If you and me are us...
I really wouldn't mind you replying me late just an assurance that you are all okay.
I don't need those cute love notes everyday (To be honest I would have loved them) but asking if I am okay genuinely would do.
I really don't want us to go on expensive dates,just us under the stars where I find peace by just resting my head on your shoulders.
I don't want you to pay all our bills when we go out together, just splitting them equally is all I need.
If you love me, I don't want you to say it all the time unless you feel it,your "Call me when you reach home safely" says it all.
I don't want us to talk 24 hrs a day,It will be all okay if you are busy just a proper short conversation at the end of the day is all I need.
I want us to talk about anything anytime without hesitation and no lying to each other.
P.S. -This won't be applicable when I planning surprises for you.
Tag the ones you love 💕💕💕..... #micromelodies ❤